The Quest

This is my first Van Damme movie while running. It definitely isn't his best work but also better than some of his newer straight to DVD movies. It is also directed by Jean Claude himself. This brings me to my first point; Van Damme movies always have the trade mark triple take of every medium to major kick or punch. It happens so often it kind of gets old but now we have a movie that he is the director and the triple take was gone. I always thought that he did it because he thought he was awesome but it must have been somebody else idea. Okay to get to the movie now. He is a lovable street thief that is only doing it to help a bunch of homeless kids. He ends up getting into trouble and ends up on a boat. From there he is sold to a oriental dude that trains him to fight. He ends up going to a secret battle deep in Asia. He makes it to the last fight and in typical Van Damme fashion (Rocky Balboa is the same way) he gets the crap kicked out of him; going down like three times he should have been dead. He fights his way back and wins so he can return to the hobo children and make a good life for them. 90 minute movie and I ran 90 minutes so I would say it was a successful movie.

Daybreakers

I hesitated to watch this one for two reasons. 1 it is a vampire movie which could either be really good (Interview With a Vampire) or really bad (any corey feldman vampire movie) and 2 even if it sucked it would still probably make me jump which isn't good on a treadmill. I ended up really enjoying it. It was fairly fast paced and it took vampires to a different place than all the others. So, as not to ruin the movie I will briefly say that it is a story about what happens when all the humans are gone and there is no more blood to drink. It was a fairly clean movie even with a few bad words but it was very gory but not the ridiculous teenage horror flick gore, instead more well placed artsy gore. I watched the whole thing in one run of 8-9 miles. It gets an A and I would probably watch it again.

The Man With Two Brains

Starring Steve Martin and Kathleen Turner. Lets start by saying I don't know why anybody thought this woman was attractive. She is in several movies in the 80s that I know of always cast as a supposed sexy woman. I just don't see it as I think she has some manly features. But enough of that, long story short, Steve Martin marries this woman that is only after his money. She gives it up to every bell hop and room service man around but never for her husband in hopes to drive him mad and get his money. He is a brain surgeon that finds a woman brain that can talk to him. He falls madly in love and fortunate for him manages to transfer the good brain to his now dead wife that was killed by Merv Griffin. Lets just say that the first 2-3 miles of running was misery, not funny, boring, terrible. After that it picked up quite a bit and turned out alright for a stupid Steve Martin film. I give it a rating of C mostly because I wanted to die in the first 2 miles but I did finish the whole film so that was a plus.

Last Action Hero

I wish I could start my reviews with a greater film but here we are. The Last Action Hero starring none other than Arnold Schwarzenegger staring as a typical action hero in several movies that a teenage kid enjoys watching. The kid gets sucked into the movie screen and becomes Arnold's sidekick. The villain gets a hold of the ticket that transports people between worlds and ends up in real life where Arnold and the kid must save the day. This movie started out good enough as a running movie. Plenty of action to make you forget about glancing at the clock every 5 minutes. There is one particular good scene where a dead body is set to fart out nerve gas that came around the 5-6 mile mark that held my attention. After they transported to the real world it went down hill and as I finished a little more than 7 miles I was left with 10-15 minutes left of movie that I may not watch. I rate this movie a B- being carried by the action scenes and the soundtrack.

Movie Reviews by Me

I know that this is called All Things Boar Goat but I am going to inject into this Movie Reviews by Me. I know I could create another blog but I don't want to burden all of my followers with this. So, one place for it all. Before I review my first movie I just want to explain what I am doing here. I am running a lot on the treadmill and have a screen that I watch Netflix Instant Watch movies. I am very limited on quality movies plus I am running on average 7 miles while watching so I thought I would give insight into which movies you should see and which movies you should pass on based on how I feel during the run.

I am here Jen. It has been about a year and a half since I last posted. I probably should just delete the account. Everything I post in here I should just post on facebook but maybe I will try and bring this back to life. I will think of something to write and be back soon....P.S. Boar Goat is still alive.

The Missing Link?

I know, I know, I'm not talking about the missing link for mankind. I'm talking about the missing link between the world as we believe in and the world of the mystically abnormal. What you are about to witness is not Boar Goat but a more highly advanced mystical creature simply known as Bull Goat.

As you guessed it; it is part Bull (as in bovine) and part Goat. There may be some other parts yet to be determined. I am well pleased with the photos that Kile and I were able to get because of the ferociousness of the beast. For it let out a deafening bellow as we approached and only refrained from attacking due to its overwhelming laziness.

Ladies and Gentlemen behold Bull Goat: